feellikeibelong | VtM: A Fatal Desire

Entry tags:

!vampire the masquerade psl

VtM: A Fatal Desire

Things had been going well. Helena had thought she'd finally found someone she could potentially be with. He hadn't minded the fact she'd had a child out of wedlock. That was rare for men in these times. However, things had gone horribly wrong a few nights prior. Helena had found her beloved daughter, Christina, had been murdered. It had effectively killed her, and she'd spent the past few days planning a funeral she never thought she would have to plan. On top of that, she'd tried to contact Dorian, to reach out to him, but she hadn't been able to find him.

As she stood at her daughter's grave, her heart was in shreds. She'd spent a lot of time the past few days crying that she couldn't cry anymore now. As she watched the dirt fill in the grave, Helena was determined to find out who had killed her daughter, and she was going to find Dorian one way or the other.

That determination led her into traveling through the darker, seedier parts of the city. She would go to whatever lengths to find vengeance for her daughter. The grief she was bearing was too great, and she instead focused on doing what she felt needed to be done, which was looking for Dorian as well as learning who killed her daughter. Of course, a woman should not be alone in that part of the city at night, but she didn't care. She was armed, she wasn't defenseless by any means.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

In no time at all, Helena found herself back at her home. It wasn't a place she wanted to be in, for obvious reasons, but she nodded at his instructions. She quickly moved off to her room and began packing clothes and any personal affects she would decidedly miss were they left behind. Even though she packing in haste, she was taking the time to fold her clothes and ensure nothing would break during travel.

Once she had her things packed, Helena went to Christina's room, and she stopped short. She didn't completely want to go into the room, fearing she'd find her daughter's body once more. Taking in a deep breath, she moved in and began to take some of Christina's things. Among the items was a hand-sewn blanket, a couple dolls and a few other personal effects. She took them and packed them in with her own things, tears lining her eyes but she refused to let them fall. For the moment she started crying, she knew she would never stop.

At that moment, she truly had no idea of the implications of Dorian telling her he was a vampire. Though once she had everything packed that she wanted, she paused and took out a small box of jewelry she had packed. Opening it, she pulled out a locket and she put it around her neck. Inside there was a picture of Christina, and she wanted to keep it with her always. Closing the box and repacking it, she grabbed the trunk and moved back to Dorian with it in tow.

"I am ready," she said softly. She looked at him, noting the exhaustion on his face. The initial questions about it that came to mind did rather have obvious answers, so didn't bother to ask them.

By the time she came back out Dorian had managed to get a carriage there and waiting the coat and weapons were back inside of his trunk and he looked like himself again the blood cleaned away and the trunk on the back of the carriage. When she came out with her things he nodded and took them from her to put them on the carriage.

"We have one stop to make, then we leave this town forever. Unless, you need to stop and say goodbye to Christina again, then it would be two stops. Either way we must go. We are both in grave danger now."

As Dorian took her things from her, she did notice he looked better, but didn't make mention of it. She instead looked back at what had been her home. Leaving it was only natural at this point, but she couldn't help but feel saddened upon needing to leave and not return. After all, it had been her home.

Looking back to Dorian, she drew in a steadying breath. "I would like to say goodbye to Christina one last time." The emotions that statement stirred up were intense. The pain and grief stabbing her through the heart more potently than any sharpened weapon ever could. Though she nodded at his words, understanding they needed to leave. Oddly, or perhaps not oddly, it was more difficult to know she'd never return to visit her daughter's grave than it was to leave her home behind.

But of course, that home would've become a tomb to her soon enough as it stood. So perhaps leaving would be for the best. She at least had some of Christina's things, the ones with the most sentimental value on them. Helena would cling to those desperately, hoping they would help her in dealing with her grief.

One of the poor maids on this street were very weak right now and would have no idea why. He had come down upon her in a quick way from the darkness and move back into the shadows just as fast. Dorian reached out as she looked back and he placed a hand on her shoulder. "I am sorry, I truly am." He spoke sympathetically, opening the carriage door for her he waited for her to enter. Looking up to the driver he called out the name of the cemetery, it could be the wrong one as he was not at the funeral, it was an educated guess given Helena's standing in society. "Then we will go to her." He replied to her as he stepped in to the carriage after her.

After tonight he would no longer waste his blood around her by flushing himself with color. This would be the last night she see him looking alive unless he makes a change in their lives. For now his goal was to save her life and then possibly end his.

"I will not lie and say this pain gets easier but in time days will pass when the pain is not as sharp, but a more constant dull ache. Mayhaps it is not much to offer but it is all I can offer." He explained as the carriage started to pull off to take them away Dorian placed a hand over his eyes the pain he had been ignoring was getting worse. The blood bond had been severed but he could still feel what he had done and it was getting agonizing.

At the hand on her shoulder, she turned her gaze back to him, a storm of emotions passing through her eyes. Helena was still decidedly refusing to break and let her emotions out. At his words, she drew in a breath, attempting to steel herself against her emotions. She climbed into the carriage and took a seat, looking down at her hands as he got in after her. He had guessed the correct cemetery, so she didn't correct him on it.

Lifting her gaze back to him, she heard his words and understood his intent with them. "How long does it take before the pain is not as sharp?" Helena understood it would be a long time before that happened, but she asked anyway. After all, she was starting to question what the point of remaining alive would be without her daughter there to share it with her. Perhaps she should have let the flames cut off their only means of escape and consumed them both. Or perhaps she should've thrown herself to the flames or shot herself before Dorian had returned.

Seeing the way he put his hand over his eyes, she could see he was distressed. "Are you well?" She asked, though immediately wondered if she shouldn't have, if it was something relating to his vampiric state that she shouldn't know about.

The carriage rolled through the night while Dorian's body started wracking with pain. He was doing everything he could to remain still and hide the horrible discomfort growing praying at worst it seemed like a headache, after all she mattered most. Getting her safe.

It took him a few minutes to realize she had questioned time and his being. "It took me a few years before my mind did not drift to them daily. And I will be fine, just fine." He murmured the last bits.

Soon the carriage stopped and he looked to her the pain showing in his eyes. "Do you wish to go alone?" No one would find them yet and he figured she would wish to be alone, but he never said goodbye to Christina.

A few years. Helena didn't know if she was strong enough to endure that long. She knew if Dorian left her, she wouldn't have the strength to carry on. Even knowing what he was, and having questions as to whether he actually cared for her or if it had all been a lie as well, he was all she had now. She didn't know if she could put her life back together yet again. Last time her life had fallen apart, she'd had Christina that she needed to provide for, so she'd pulled herself together and managed to survive. This time around, what did she have? Christina was gone. She had no family. She obviously couldn't be with her friends ever again. Dorian was it, and if he left, what reason did she have to pull her life back together?

She nodded a bit, acknowledging his words. She wasn't entirely certain if he would be fine, but they'd pulled up to the cemetery, and she drew in a deep breath. "You may come if you wish to say goodbye to Christina," she said. She knew Christina had liked him, and she wouldn't deny him the goodbye if he wanted it.

Helena opened the door of the carriage and got out. She had been there hours earlier burying her daughter. It was far colder and harsher now, but she at least could let Christina know that her killer had been brought to justice. She made her way to where Christina's grave was. It was obvious it was still a freshly filled-in grave. She knelt down beside the headstone. She reached out and ran a hand over the carved letters on the stone that bore her daughter's name: Christina Alice Wells. Below her name were the dates of her birth and death: May 16, 1838 - July 14, 1846. Below that was the simple inscription of "Beloved Daughter."

"Christina, mummy's here. I want you to know that the one responsible for your death will never hurt anyone else again. I wish I could say I would come visit you often, but I must leave this place, never to return. It is just as well, this will be home again without you here. You know I am not one to pray or even one to believe in God, but I hope that wherever you are, you are at peace. I love you more than anything, and I will always keep you close to my heart. You were the greatest gift I could have ever asked for." She sniffed lightly, her resolve against holding her emotions at bay starting to crack, and she felt tears stinging the backs of her eyes. "Don't worry about me, Alexander will be helping me. Or I should say Dorian, as is his true name. Perhaps one day you and I will be reunited, love. Until then, I will keep you in my heart and my memories." Helena leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the gravestone. She knelt there for several more moments in silent reflection. Her emotions were starting to threaten to spill over, but she was still trying to fight them, to keep them inside. She wouldn't break. Couldn't break. Not until they were safe.

Dorian knew already that by the end of this night she would be his companion or a corpse. He had no plan to turn her yet but maybe just keep her alive awhile. He needed a princes' blessing before he could embrace. So, he needed to assure she was not going to kill herself before risking that. Despite feeling like his body was trying to destroy him for the sin he just committed he wanted to be there for her.

Despite the pain Dorian slipped out after a minute or two, snatching some flowers off other graves as he made his way over, kneeling beside Helena A hand placed on her shoulder as he looked at the tombstone. He never saw his families tombstone... "Hello Princess." He had jokingly called her that once and it just kind of stuck, he would play lowly servant to make her laugh whenever she was awake while he was around. She had been one of those rare lights. He tightened his grip on her shoulder. "I will keep your mother safe Christina, and when it is safe to return I will see to it that you are visited every year." Even if he killed her mother he would still come back.

Dorian stood silently looking down at the stone, just days ago the girl was so lively, and now she was dead. The least he could do was keep her mother safe.

Feeling Dorian's hand on her shoulder, she drew in a slow breath, trying to keep herself under control. It wasn't easy whatsoever, but she would keep herself together for the meantime. She looked over at him at hearing his promise to keep her safe, and also to ensure Christina was visited every year. Even if she couldn't return, as long as she was alive Helena would find a way to send flowers anonymously to Christina's grave each year.

Though Helena couldn't help but have the question in the back of her mind about wondering if Dorian truly cared about her. All the things he'd said and done in the time they'd known each other, had that been part of his lies? It was something she would ask about eventually. But for now, she wasn't going to turn him away from her. She did need him, even if he was now mostly a stranger to her.

After he stood up, Helena took some more moments to silently reflect on things. She knew they couldn't linger much longer, however, so she reached out and gently ran her fingers over the stone. "Mummy needs to go now, but when I am able, I will return to visit. I love you, Christina, and you will always be in my heart." Drawing in a deep, steadying breath, Helena finally stood up, looking down at the fresh grave one last time before looking to Dorian. "I am ready," she said finally. For she knew if she stayed any longer, she would not leave.

Though he had lied about his feelings at first part of why he had left was because they started to become true, and Matthew had won the game by sleeping with one of Helena's friends. The rules stated they had to run before someone asked of Marriage. Though Dorian was offically a widower twice over he couldn't shed a tear for his second wife. He had been demented into saying yes when she had them married. He had hated Phoebe with every bit of himself.

when she stood he looked back to the tombstone and muttered something in... dutch. A promise to make her mother happy again ot to have her laid beside her. As he lead her toward the carriage. "One last stop and then we can leave this place. I am sorry for the life you are about to enter. But you have seen into my world, the choices for you are slim, my dear. And I would rather keep you well then the alternatives."

Opening the carriage door for her he waited for her to enter before giving the address to the driver. They were going to Phoebe's townhouse. Where the money and other things were hidden.

Helena didn't understand what he muttered in Dutch. That was a language she didn't speak, but she wasn't going to ask for a translation. It was clearly something between him and Christina and no one else. Had he wished her to understand, he would have said it in English. As they returned to the carriage, Helena looked at him. The fact there were alternatives plural surprised.

"What else is an alternative other than death?" Because that one she was fairly certain was one of the alternatives. And so okay, the fact he seemed to not want to kill her was a good thing. Perhaps it meant he did truly feel something for her. Or perhaps it meant absolutely nothing other than he didn't want to kill her. For the moment, she would put her money on the fact he just didn't want to kill her. To expect anything else was no doubt going to set her up for more pain, and more pain was the very last thing she needed right now.

She climbed into the carriage again, and drew in a long breath. She glanced out the window towards Christina's grave on the off-chance it would be the last time she would see it.

She had been right. had he wanted her to know he would have said it in English. Growing up he had learned Dutch along with English. he spoke both fluently, though he would loose the Dutch over the next century from lack of use.

When the carriage rolled off he leaned in whispering close to her ear. Becuase, ya know dangers all around. "You can either become my companion until such a time as you choose to go or it is safe, or I could embrace you, but to be embraced I have to have a prince's blessing which means we have to move and get in good with a prince. For now, you will be my retainer, a human who guards over a cainite while they rest and provide blood. Granted..." He sat back so he didn't have to whisper so close to her ear anymore. "You mean more then that to me." That at least was not a lie. The carriage rolled on pulling into a nice neighborhood.

When he whispered to her of the other options, she was a bit surprised by the turning her one. Not only had it not occurred to her (especially considering she'd only known of his vampiric state for the past hour or so), but now that he'd said it, she hadn't really expected him to make the offer. Though given he needed a prince's blessing to turn her, it just seemed like too much trouble to go through, and right now she didn't think she was worth the trouble.

"I will watch over you and do what I can to help you." Not that she felt she could do much given she was only human. But she could at least ensure he was safe during the day, and she would let him drink from her if he needed.

Helena looked at him, slightly surprised that she actually did mean something to him. It answered the niggling question in her mind. It meant a lot to her that he felt that way, and it reinforced the fact she'd made the right decision when she had gone to track him down.

"I am happy I tracked you down tonight." Otherwise she probably would be dead by her own hand by dawn. At least knowing he cared for her would stay such action from her. At least for the time being. Once she actually let herself feel her grief and express it, that could change drastically. But for now, she was more than willing to at least try and see where they went and settle into a new life.

He felt a little guilty as easily as she agreed with the idea of being his retainer. He nodded some, carefully reaching over and grasping one of her hands in his. he could still remember sitting in the dark cell knowing everyone he loved was dead and having no one to help him. He wanted her to know he was here to help her, she was not alone. Lacing their fingers, for once his hand felt cold, he was not hiding what he was anymore, not from her. He was pale and his features seemed a bit sharper.

"Thank you." He finally responded to the agreement before looking out the window as they rolled on. "I wish you have come for me sooner, or that I had come to see you. Mayhaps things would be different." Maybe Christina would have been alive. When the carriage stopped again he pulled her hand with him, urging her to follow.

"Come with me. Anything you want inside is yours." It was a lovely town house the inside lit up. Strange to know it was where he had been living when not hiding in the slums. he had never showed her where he lived of course moving for the door he already had the keys out.

Perhaps she had agreed too quickly, but at this moment in time, she had two options. One was to stay with him, and the other was to be alone and either homeless or living in less-than-savory parts of some city. And frankly, she'd rather stay with Dorian now. As he took her hand and laced their fingers, she held onto his hand, using it as a means to ground herself. It was odd to feel his hand being cold, but she didn't dwell on it now that she knew what he was.

"Perhaps," she responded simply. Though she doubted much would have changed. And she wasn't exactly going to say she'd spent the first couple days waiting to hear from him and trying to contact him to no avail. Right now she wanted to try and focus on anything other than the pain and grief, not get into more pain and sorrow.

As he pulled her hand, she followed after him, looking at the town house. It was certainly quite the lovely place. She nodded a bit at his words, her gaze moving over the place as he pulled the keys out to open the door. Helena didn't stray from his side. He'd said they were in danger, and she wanted to stay close to him in the event something did happen. While she could defend herself, she wasn't certain she could truly defend herself against vampires just yet.

He nodded at her words as he lead her inside of the house, it was breath taking inside. Clearly a woman's touch and above the fireplace. was a portrait it was the only reason Dorian knew what he looked like anymore. Himself, Phoebe, Maria and Matt The boys standing behind the girls who were both seated on chairs. A lot of money went into that portrait. He kissed the back of her hand and moved to pull open the closet door closest to them, three trunks sat inside and he pulled all three out caling for the carriage driver.

"All three of these please. And we will be out directly." He spoke. "As I said Helena. Anything you want in here is yours. We wont be able to return and I doubt my companions will come here when they realize what has happened." he spoke as he moved to the fireplace pulling, ys pulling the frame straight down.

"Run upstairs two rooms up here have jewelry boxes full of jewels." Money, he was stealing what he could from his sire. both of the rooms he sent her too had lovely gowns hanging up and such pretty things cause these vamp women lived lavish.

The house was certainly extravagant. It reminded Helena of her parents' home in London. It gave a further pang of hate and resentment. This place reminded her of the life she'd been born into, then cast out of simply because she'd become pregnant outside of marriage. She resented her family for that, and felt she'd managed to make something of her life. At least up until four nights earlier when Christina had been killed.

Helena nodded a bit at his words. She wasn't certain what she would want from this place, but she would certainly take something. At the very least she could sell whatever she took in order to have some money for themselves. She did pause to look up at the portrait over the fireplace. She felt the burning pang of hate and anger run through at seeing Phoebe and she quickly turned her face away.

At the mention of where the jewelry was, Helena went upstairs. Jewelry she could sell easily. Moving to the first room, she found the first jewelry box easily enough. Grabbing it, she moved it over by the door, and then she went to the closet, grabbing several of the gowns there. She took them and the jewelry box, then moved to the second room and pilfered the jewelry box and some more of the gowns. She then brought them all downstairs, moving carefully so she wouldn't trip and fall down the stairs. Even if she had suicidal thoughts, falling down the stairs and breaking her neck was not the way she wanted to die.

By the time she came down two more trunks were downstairs and a rolled up canvous in his hands as he held the door for her. He knew Matthew would return soon enough and everything else would safe until then. Despite what he had said. As he lead them abck to the carriage everything was loaded and soon they would be rolling again.

"We are heading to Carolina." he spoke looking to her. "We will not make it before dawn so there will be a stop at an inn or two. I hope it will not make you uncomfortable to room with me but I would feel better if we did stay together. Of course our names must be shed."

Heading out the door, she moved to the carriage, helping to load what she'd carried out before she got into the carriage. She didn't pay the house any further attention once she'd exited it. She wanted nothing further to do with what had been Phoebe's. She and Dorian had exacted their vengeance on her, and even if that put their lives in jeopardy, Helena was glad the bitch was dead, as it were.

Looking to Dorian, she gave a nod about going to Carolina. "No, that would not make me uncomfortable. On the contrary, it would be a comfort." Helena didn't precisely want to be alone, especially when they needed to relocate. And then there came the subject of needing an alias. She didn't need overly much time to think of an alias for herself, not when she knew as much literature as she did. "Ophelia. Are we going to appear as a couple or siblings?" She figured it was a worthwhile question to ask as it would affect how they acted around each other when in public.

"I tire of claiming sibblings I do not have. We will buy you a ring somewhere and claim you are my wife. None will question us rooming together that way." He spoke as he leaned back against the seat of the carriage more. That pain returning. It would come and go until it got bad and he has a break down. After that he will be fine.

"Shall I be Hamlet then? Fitting." He chuckled. "No, I will keep the name I bare, it is my middle name after all. Is there a last name you fancy, Miss Ophelia?" he spoke as he crossed his arms over his ribs closing his eyes. Finally admitting. "Destorying ones sire after being trapped in a blood spell brings a horrid pain. Do not fret if I start to react badly."

Helena nodded. It certainly would make plenty of sense for them to pose as husband and wife. And it would perhaps be easier than attempting to pose as siblings.

She shrugged a bit. "Jones is fine enough with me." She was a bit low on creativity at the moment for understandable reasons. "Unless you have a better one at hand?" She figured she'd ask, anyway. Perhaps he had a better surname in mind they could use. Though when he explained the pain he was feeling, she looked at him, feeling concern for him, of course. "Is there anything that can be done to ease the pain?" She had no idea, thus why she asked about it in the first place.

He didn't mind it in the least, if she choose to crash beside him in the hotel it meant he had a nice warm body to keep him warm and he was fond of her.

"Jones is fine, the only other I can think of is Daniels. and that just, feels unnecessary." He shook his head some then. "Alas no, there is nothing that can be done aside waiting it out. If anyone offers to call a doctor tell them I am fine. Premit no one in the room where I rest in the day and most importantly, no sunlight can enter the room." He couldn't stress that one enough.

At this juncture, Helena wasn't entirely certain if she could sleep. Sooner or later, exhaustion would force her to sleep, but she had nightmares, reliving finding her daughter's body, and she did not sleep for long when she did. Perhaps having Dorian in the same room would serve to give her some amount of comfort. She just hoped that if she woke with a start from a nightmare that she wouldn't disturb him in his slumber.

"I do not like Daniels," she said with a slight wrinkle of her nose. She nodded a bit, hearing out his explanation. "I understand, no doctors. I will ensure the curtains are thick and drawn before the sun rises and that they will stay that way until the sun sets." Perhaps it was odd how well she was taking the revelation he was a vampire, but the truth was she was still in shock given everything that had happened since Christina had died. Once she began to calm, it would no doubt truly set in what her life would be like from this point forward. But for now, she was simply going with it because it meant she wasn't alone.

And she was fond of Dorian and wanted to be around him.

Dorian would try to get her too, or to at least lay down with him so he could have a nice human heater. He quite enjoyed those. He would not make a move of course because shes is in mourning and it is unnecessary. If her nightmares got too bad he would certainly wake and wake her. He knows how much those suck.

"Very good, and Jones it is." He spoke as he watched things roll by. "I thank you much for your consideration and acceptance of what I am Helena. You must know that me telling you is punishable by death for both me and you. So no one can know you know. I will have to bite you once we are in the hotel in case there are any Kindred are about the bite will heal up right away of course but it will be almost like a silent brand to keep them away from you." Not that it worked that way, but he figured if he had at elast fed from her he could reasonably say she was his retainer.

Making a move would not be the best idea for the foreseeable future. As much as she had grown fond of Dorian, she wasn't currently in the mindset to pursue anything. And there was also the fact she had only just learned his real name and what he was. She certainly had questions of just how much he had told her before tonight had been true.

She looked over at him. "Your secret is safe with me." She certainly had no intention on telling anyone that he was a vampire or letting on that she even knew he was a vampire. Helena was actually quite calm about the fact knowing this was punishable by death for them both. If it happened, it happened. "By bite me, do you mean drink from me?" Helena highly doubted he would just bite her without taking some blood from her. If it helped him and would keep other vampires away from her, she was inclined to allow it.

VtM: A Fatal Desire

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)

(no subject)